21×21: 21 Things Men Should Know By 21

Tie a necktie: Be it for a job interview, wedding, or a funeral; inevitably, at some point in your life you will have to do it. So learn now.

Wash clothes: Nobody likes funky clothes, especially the people who have to smell them!

Clean your house: I’m not talking about that quick and easy, tidy up clean. I’m talking about scrubbing toilets, dusting and polishing, preparing fresh linens, kind of clean. You’ve got to learn how to get down in the bedroom, kitchen and the bathroom.

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Balance an account: Despite the reality of vanishing checkbooks, check writing is still a good skill to have, and certainly learning to balance an account is essential. You always need to know your income and expenses.

Replace a light bulb: As long as they go out, they will need replacing.

Iron clothes: Contrary to what Beyoncé says, is not cool to just wake up like that. Although you may not have to iron, learning how to is valuable. There’s a system for shirts, pants and jeans.

Learn to pray: Being a man is hard, learning to pray makes it less hard.


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Shop for clothes: Knowing the actual size of your waist, shoe, chest, and neck, and knowing how to buy clothes that fit is just what cool men do. Oversized suits, shirt collars and scrunchie waist jeans isn’t the look. If you have to tighten your belt more 3 loops, something’s not right.

Say please and thank you: Common, or should I say, uncommon courtesy will never expire. Sometimes it can open doors a strong hand can’t.

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Shake a hand: Please don’t be one of those guys who gives the limp noodle handshake or the Incredible Hulk grip.

Buy groceries: Sooner or later, you’ll have move past cardboard pizzas, frozen meals, soda and potato chips. The fresh produce section is your friend, and so is the natural herbs and spices section.

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Cook a meal: Thank God my moms and pops taught me how to cook. Every man needs at least one signature dish that doesn’t involve ingredients that read, “instant”, “quick” or “ready in minutes” on the box.

Use a screwdriver, hammer and saw: I’m not talking about transforming you into Harold the Handyman, but there are some basic jobs these tools can handle if you plan on living on earth any longer.

Change a tire: Imagine it’s 30 degrees, you get a flat tire, and you don’t have AAA or roadside assistance. Now imagine it’s you and your lady and you don’t know how to change a tire or put on the spare. I’ve seen able-bodied men send their lady in the cold to do it, and that’s cold, very cold.

Jump a battery: Trust me, it’s a vital skill to learn. Also, make sure get a good pair of jumper cables or a battery charger for your trunk.

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Wash your butt: Let me help you out. The following are not cool: biting your nails, having excessively long or dirty nails, uncombed or unbrushed hair,  unkept facial hair, smelly breath and BO. Here’s what’s cool…the opposite of all of the above.

Ask for help: Humility is not weakness, it’s reserved strength. In this life we all help, and the sooner we learn to recognize it, the better.

Sign an autograph: Whether it’s on a contract, business agreement or permission slip, every man needs to know to sign his name.

Visit the doctor: Real men visit the doctor… regularly. Your health isn’t about you, it’s about the ones around you. The better and healthier you are, the better and healthier they are. This includes mental and spiritual health as well.

Unclog a toilet or drain: Sometimes things suck, sometimes they don’t. The latter is when this skill comes in handy.

Get in touch with God: We all need Him. If your appliance breaks down you return it to the manufacturer, shouldn’t you do the same with your life?

 

 

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Brother to Brother: 10 Types of Women You Shouldn’t Date

In one of my recent posts, I gave women ten types of men to avoid, and although lots of women enjoyed the insight, the brothers felt left out. So, what about all the good brothers out there? The ones who love God, have common sense, are hard-working, and have a vision? Where do they find love? Although it’s arguable who has it worse, the fact is, for some men it’s very difficult to find a lady who is attractive, spiritual, (but not spooky), and isn’t loco.  As you’re in pursuit, watch out for these of women.

Thirsty Thelma: She’s always looking for man, and will do whatever it takes to get anyone that somewhat resembles a man. Her self-worth is predicated on her relationship status, and unfortunately this makes her vulnerable to scrubs, thugs, and bedbugs. Her Facebook status affirms her. Not God, her uniqueness or creativity. Not even the man she’s with. It’s simply the satisfaction of knowing she has a man.

Freaky Felicia: Self-explanatory right? She’s the kind of  vixen open more than your local Walmart. She’s open for business for anyone…and I mean anyone. You don’t know where she’s been, or with whom she’s been with. Bye Felicia.

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Sleeping Sasha: She’s the main character in a story that’s all about her rescue from the perils of singlehood.  She’s stuck in a Disney movie, waiting for her handsome prince to ride in on a stallion, take her hand, and whisk her away to an enchanted land where love lives forever. A woman waiting on a man to become who she is destined to be is a woman out of touch with reality. These women will put unrealistic expectations on men and often play the victim instead of living victoriously.

Kangaroo Katie: She jumps in and out of relationships. Every time you see her she has a new man. She changes men like handbags. Usually, these types of women have issues they may or may not be aware of, and are looking for someone else to help fix. Sometimes they will superimpose unrealistic standards NO MAN is able to meet. They can search for minuscule, insignificant reasons to break up, and it’s on to the next one. She may even try to “build-a-boo”, by having two, three or five men on the side, each embodying a characteristic she desires.

Holy Heather: Ever met someone so spiritual they were out of touch with reality? Well fellas, this is Heather. She’s disconnected from the universe and masks genuine emotions, desires, and ideas-the ones God gives us-with spirituality. She is the, “Jesus is my boyfriend”, and “I’m just waiting on the Lord” kind of woman. She doesn’t know where she wants to go, what kind of man she’s looking for, or what qualities make her unique because, “The Lord ain’t revealed it yet.” She’s a bystander in life, and in relationships.

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Insecure Ida: Every person deals with insecurities, idiosyncrasies and issues, but Ida is unreasonably insecure. She frequently speaks and behaves in ways to seek attention or affirmation. Initially, it can be cute or attractive to think you’re genuinely needed by her, but it’s fool’s gold. Trying to love an insecure person is like trying to cut down a redwood with a razor blade. You will never say enough, do enough, or be enough to give her what she needs: real self-love that comes from above.

Wonder Woman Wanda: It’s her way or the highway. She runs a strict dictatorship, and being with her is a privilege, or so she thinks. She makes the rules, the money, and tells subjects lucky enough to be under her rule what to do, how to do it, and when to do it. She feels the need to be in control and refuses to relinquish her Queendom. Frequently, people like this are deeply insecure and feel the need to overcompensate in areas where they may feel out of control. It’s a means of security. With her, “don’t you ever for a second get to thinking you’re irreplaceable.”

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Krazy Keisha:  Just like Krazy Kevin, she gets hotter than the pavement in Arizona. She screams, cries, manipulates, and is emotionally unstable. One minute everything is fine, and the next, it’s like a scene out of, The Exorcist. She can also get physically violent, and best believe will slash tires and bust the windows out your car.

Cash-in Candace: I ain’t sayin’ she’s a gold-digger, but she ain’t messing with no broke… well, you know the song. If she’s overly-concerned about cheddar, then your life will not be better.  It’s all about the money… dollar, dollar bill y’all.  Her concept of manhood and womanhood may be rooted in false and erroneous ideologies that she will inevitably project on you.

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Heartbroken Haley: Sometimes she walks in circles.  She’s been broken so many times she has built walls taller than Jericho and you ain’t getting through brother. She may have an emotional and spiritual  deficit that may require professional counseling. She’s the younger sister of Wonder Woman Wanda, and without a real intervention, will grow up to be just like her.

It’s tempting to be Billy Graham and go on a crusade to try save a woman from herself, but trust me, you cannot do it. When hurting people hurt people, and are in need of healing, the first step is to recognize the problem. The next is getting the appropriate help. After God made the first woman, that job became obsolete. We cannot make ourselves a wife; we must allow Him to present her to us. This means, like Eve, God makes her. He never told us to fall in love, he told us to walk in it, and sometimes walking in love means knowing what paths to avoid.